Final words

I knew I was dying the entire time

oooohhhh....spookey

not really

people in perpetual pain

tend to not last long.

It's You who found out today

I knew I was dying the entire time..

From me there was no letter

This was not suicide

Hell it said it had enough

And for the devil to claim his prize.

True, I allowed the reaper free to do his work

True, instead of healing, I still allowed illness to consume me

True, this moment was that of negligence

unconscious suicide,

Existing in a world focused on payment

Rather than treatment

I knew I was dying the entire time.

Someone will probably search my books and scripts

to try and track my thoughts and shit

examine topics

Things I let Preoccupy

And when the answer is unclear

with all that stands before their eyes

They'll probably deem my death, as

Premeditated Suicide.

It's not,

I knew I was dying the entire time.

You see I haven't hung it up

I'm still very much alive

Unafraid of anything

I've learned that I will survive.

I've seen some shit that would make your head spin

It will leave you stumbling, and

uncontrollably drooling.

I've heard what you've said

no problem

Because I lived in the mist of regret

I've been haunted for Years

For but a few moments.

So feel free bringing Me Your worst

I doubt I would flinch

Nor would I tilt.

I might be a wolf in sheep's clothing

Or a newborns first gasp of air.

I never claimed I haven't earned my nightmares

Or the cross stares,

Or any of the foul, I may hear a complete stranger swear.

I'm not a Criminal

as much as I'm not a hero in despair

I suggest if you see me in a burning building

Not to even care.

I've seen

Day, Night

Dark, Light

Heaven, Hell

The inside walls of a padded cell.

I've seen

Stolen credit cards

Luxury suites

Girls without Vagina's

And a man die at my feet.

Heaven, Hell

Jail's, Prison

There was no destination in mind

Yet, I accepted every mission

For all intents and purposes it's been a hell of a ride

And just because I've foresaw my end,

Doesn't make it suicide.

I simply came to one day

Aware my days are numbered

When I saw how close I was to death

I truly became alive

I realized life is far too short, and

We're dying the entire time.